Tears from today
As I watched Addie and her friends rush back and forth from piles of snow into the hot tub during her birthday party today, a tear appeared in my eye. I was thinking of this writing project, actually, and that many of the parents of kids at that party might actually read this. And how it's us, really, just us flawed and faulty fathers and mothers, trying every day to make it possible for these kids to know they are loved. I thought of how it's damn hard to make sure our own well-being is actually being well, and that our own deepest relationships are relationally deep, so we can show up remotely whole and steady for the job at hand. It's not easy to keep it together, and yet these children here, who are at the same time so adventurous and invincible, while also completely fragile and vulnerable, they need us. There's nobody else.
I watched their antics while a song played inside the house:
None of this is in your control If you could only let your guard down If you could learn to trust …
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